and then she said...

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

That time of year...

It is the time of year again where I way over extend myself. I am not a domestic goddess although I do try. After work this week is just so booked. I am making Christmas treats for work for Friday (which is for December birthdays). This means that I will be baking every night this week in some way or another. And this year I decided to cut down on the "treats" and make some breakfast type food and still make treats, just less. So not only do I have to bake every night, on Friday I will have to get up a couple hours early then normal, which means like 4:30 am, so that I can make this breakfasty food. And the only person I can blame for this - oh yeah - ME!! And I do this to myself every year. And every year I say that I will not do it again and then what happens? Yes, I do it again. On top of all this cooking/baking, I have to finish shopping. Which means all day Saturday will be spent shopping, and maybe Thursday depending on this beautiful Michigan weather. On top of this, I have an upper respiratory infection. Yippee!! Ya know, I just read that over and I sound like an old women complaining, oh man, you do turn into your mother!! But I seriously do love to make everyone at work happy with the yummy goodies, on the menu this year, 3 different breakfast wreaths, peanut butter balls, caramel cornflake cluster, pumkin bread with cream cheese spread, and white chocolate cover marshmallow to put into Caramel hot chocolate. Ok, I got tired just typing it, I am old. Damn it!

Well, off I go to finish my day at work so that I can go home!!

Monday, December 05, 2005

Just so sad

I don't even know if this is appropriate, but I am just so sad. My sister tried to get pregnant for over a year and finally this past August found out she was pregnant. I was actually down in Arizona visiting her at the time. But this last Wednesday the baby died. The Wednesday before Thanksgiving she found at that there was something wrong with the baby, but didn't know exactly how bad it was. She did know that it might not make it through the pregnancy and if it did make it, that it probably would not live very long after the birth. Another unfortunate part is that because she was 19 weeks along, she had to have to baby naturally. They took her in on Thursday night at 6 pm and starting inducing her. She didn't have to baby until Friday night at 9:30 pm. So this long labor with absolutely no reward. My heart just breaks for her. We are all very sad. But telling my son, who is 5, was the hardest thing I think I have ever had to do. Most things roll off his back, but this just hit him so hard, he instantly starting crying when I told him. He kept asking me why, which is just an impossible question to answer. So all the things I was suppose to get done this weekend, not done.

This unfortunately is not the first time I have been through something like this. I kinda feel like a jinx. Two of my friends have had disabled children, one had a stroke in the womb and it damaged her brain, which leaves her with some leg and hand disabilities, another was born with Spina Bifida. She had water on her brain, also. So she has a shunt in her brain, has braces on her legs, and has no bowel control. Two more of my friends has disabled children that did not live, one was born with his extremities at different weeks of the pregnancy, I know that sounds weird, but literally, his legs were at like 32 weeks, his arms at 30, his head at 28, you get he point. He was feed with a feeding tube and was on a constant heart monitor, he lived until 9 months. With second one, the mom lost her amniotic fluid at 20 weeks in and carried the baby until like 31 weeks. When the baby was born it cried, which they said it would not, but still the lungs were not developed and the baby died at 14 hours old. All very sad, and unfortunately with this happening to my sister, made me think of all these times. And makes me so grateful that I have a very lovely, healthy boy.

Sorry to depress every one. I will try to make my next post a little more upbeat.